Tag Archives: partner

in defense of educated partners

21 Aug

Deep thought today, in defense of educated partners

As I watched this video, http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/upgrade-your-life/ways-date-dig-gold-uh-hook-163603898.html , I was zoning out, multi-tasking with, you know, the all-important job of staying updated with the Face Book news feed. And suddenly, one of the comments jolted me awake! Yeah, the “gold-digger” one. For some reason, that really brought -out the thought-sharing feeling in me.  You know, the one where I’m tempted to speak-out loud, but there are no listeners, because Face Book is a solitary sport.

And, I wondered why we Americans look-down upon those searching for a college-educated partner. It’s not necessarily about the money. College-educated folks will most likely get you to sign a pre-nup anyways. They’re smart about things like that. Or, at least, I expect them to be.

If you talk to folks who grew-up in Asia, most notably in China and India, the whole focus is on education. It is important to get a good job, and be able to support a family, before you start one. In practical terms, it indicates the person is hard-working, dedicated and committed. They set goals and stick to the plans, even when the going gets tough. A consistent employment history shows they can manage to work with people without pissing them off enough to get fired. Or, they don’t give-in to whimsical “I quit” tantrums. They learn and grow on the job as the requirements and job descriptions change.

As a partner and co-parent, you could expect them to stay with you through difficult times, and work through the challenges. If you do end-up getting divorced, they are more likely to stay involved with the kids. The more accomplished they feel, the deeper the desire in them to “pass-on” their legacy. People with low self-esteem have a hard time being role-models for kids, because kids hold-up a unique mirror to our souls.

Oh, and if they’ve been convicted and sent to jail, for any reason whatsoever, stay away from them. Most laws in America follow basic character qualities. If they broke a law, it would also indicate some serious character flaw that goes with it. (That applies even if they are highly educated).

So folks, what do you think… is it “wrong” to look for a College-educated partner, with a steady job?